Confronting Systemic Cultural Sexism

Confronting Systemic Cultural Sexism

By Marlene Molewyk

Doctor of Theological Ministry in New Testament Context, Northern Seminary
M.A., Global Leadership, Emphasis in Biblical Studies, Fuller Theological Seminary
B.A., Communications and Political Science, University of Michigan

"Culture is shaped by what we celebrate, and also by what we tolerate."

—Wally Harrison, on the ethos of the Harbor church network in west Michigan

Several years ago, my family watched the movie Captain Marvel, which has a strong female superhero in the lead role. Early on, I overheard a man complain, "Yep, of course the hero is a woman. That's what every movie has to have now: a female hero in the lead role. I'm tired of this political correctness!” I initially tracked with his thinking, until I was suddenly struck by the thought: "Wait a second. Have I ever watched a movie and complained, 'Yep, of course the hero is a man. That's what every movie has to have: a male hero in the lead role. I’m so tired of this!'"

The answer is no, I never previously had such thoughts, even though probably 98 percent of the movies I’ve watched in my lifetime have had a male hero in the lead role. Why might this be? It's because I had unknowingly internalized the false societal belief that ALL lead movie roles rightfully belong to men. In Invisible Women, author Caroline Perez calls this “male-unless-otherwise-indicated” bias, and it silently created cognitive dissonance whenever I saw a female hero in a lead role, because I subconsciously—and wrongly—assumed that she had usurped that role from a man. And I say that even though I’m a woman!

This points to a deeper reality: throughout most of world history, men have sat atop the social hierarchy in churches and society, with few exceptions. In Confronting Sexism In the Church, author Heather Matthews explains that this male positional power results in a societal bias that favors men and considers them superior to women.

Perez also notes that men are considered the default norm for human beings. To explain this, suppose you're the only woman in a business or ministry meeting. Many women in such situations will stifle all emotions to avoid being labeled emotional, which really means irrational, illogical, and possibly hysterical. But are all women really too emotional? Only when compared to the norm of a man.

But in his book Real Boys, Harvard psychologist William Pollock explains that men are actually every bit as emotional as women. The difference is that most men (though not all) are socialized to suppress emotions that "society teaches them are unacceptable for men and boys—fear, uncertainty, feelings of loneliness and need." And that is the male norm that women are expected to emulate.

But suppressed emotions are like cholesterol—they build up silently until they hit a critical mass and erupt in unhealthy, life-threatening behaviors. A University of Michigan research study elaborates: "Rather than appearing sad, men experiencing emotional pain are more likely to react with anger, self-destructive behavior, self-distraction, or numbing of pain with substance use, gambling, womanizing, and workaholism." A University of Melbourne study conducted by O'Gorman et al. adds suicide and aggressive actions to this list of behaviors, which they explain are "avoidant coping strategies... utilized in order to avoid distressing thoughts or feelings." Following are statistics that illustrate how these avoidant coping strategies impact men:

·  Men are 50% more likely than women to struggle with alcohol and substance abuse.

·  "Men died of overdose at 2-3 times greater a rate than women."

·  "Men outnumber women... about 2 to 1 among people with gambling addictions."

·  Married men are almost twice as likely to cheat on their wives than vice versa.

·  The male suicide rate is approximately 4 times higher than the female rate.

·  Men commit 69% of violent crimes.

·  Men comprised 98% of active shooters in 2022-2023.

·  Men comprise 90% of the prison population (1,653,600 men, 174,000 women; not a typo).

·  Almost 400,000 men in the prison population are Protestant.

·  An appalling number of male pastors and ministry leaders, including 700+ SBC pastors, have sexually abused girls and women, then attempted to cover up the abuse.

It's important to note that the above behaviors and statistics do not apply to all men! But they nevertheless provide compelling evidence that an enormous number of men engage in emotionally driven behaviors that ironically fit the Merriam-Webster definitions for irrational, illogical, and dare I say... hysterical. Yet the false belief that all women are irrational, illogical, and hysterical endures, due to its underlying premise: that women are allegedly inferior to men. Following is a powerful three-minute video that cleverly unmasks this faulty premise:

For those seeking a Christian perspective on the hidden gender bias/sexism so skillfully unveiled in the above video, Dr. Heather Matthews' Confronting Sexism In the Church is an excellent resource. Its first ten chapters, reviewed in previous posts on this Substack, cover the history of church sexism, the history and theology of antisexism, and practical action steps to confront sexism in relationships, Christian leadership, churches, and organizations.

In the final chapter, "Confronting Systemic Cultural Sexism", Matthews explains that sexism is universal: "Every day, in every country... women are confronted by discrimination and inequality. They face violence, abuse and unequal treatment at home, at work, and in their wider communities—and are denied opportunities to learn, to earn and to lead." As a result, Matthews points out that over 60 percent of rural girls around the world do not receive a high school level education, and "women make up more than two-thirds of the world's 796 million illiterate people." Women also generally earn less than men, comprise "less than 20 percent of the world's landowners" and are subject to rape, trafficking, child marriage, domestic abuse, and more.

Despite this grim data, Matthews reminds us about Christian people and organizations who successfully confronted horrific sexist practices in the past, as well as those striving to do the same today, including International Justice Mission, Missio Alliance, and CBE (Christians for Biblical Equality) International. She notes that their work reflects the heart of God: "Throughout the New Testament we see that love for God is always linked to love for neighbor." Finally, Matthews provides a list of practical ways to confront sexism. Following are two of those ways; you'll need to read the book for the rest:

Speak up (women):

Matthews exhorts: "In order to confront sexism, we must begin by using our voices." My friend Amy (pseudonym) emphatically agrees and gave me permission to share the following:

Amy was making copies at work when a male employee, Voldemort (pseudonym), walked up behind her and rubbed his crotch up and down her backside. Amy filed a complaint with HR, but there were no witnesses, so the complaint was placed in Voldemort's employee file, and that's it. Much later, Amy discovered that Voldemort had previously sexually harassed three other women in the company, including someone she knew. However, none had filed a complaint because they didn't think they'd be believed. Amy stated: "If the others had spoken up, this wouldn't have happened to me. That's why it's so important to speak up! You're not just doing it for yourself, you're also doing it to protect other women down the road!"

Speak up (men):

Men can choose to believe that women are telling the truth about harassment/abuse/sexism, then speak up for and pursue justice alongside them, or they can choose the silencing, vilifying route. Pastor and writer Brian Metzger observes that the latter stems from prioritizing organizations over people: "A whole lot of people are willing to ignore the behavior of a bully as long as they get things done and advance the overall goals of an organization." It can also stem from prioritizing personal ambition over people; Metzger notes: "So much of our identity can become associated with being in the coolest, most successful herd that until it's my leg the wolf is gnawing on, I can have tremendous capacity to ignore [the herd's] malpractice."

That being said, when men follow in Jesus's footsteps and boldly speak up against sexism, it can make a huge difference, because advocates from within a dominant group exert more influence among their peers than people from non-dominant groups can. I recently had a conversation with just such an advocate for women in the church, Cambridge-educated theologian Philip Payne. I'll conclude this post with a powerful three-minute video of Philip sharing a tragic personal story that underscores the importance of Christian equality and mutualism:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1tYCVP1nwGZDHd7dIsDhzJ_5zFsf9LgOj/view?usp=sharing